doors
in our lives we have many doors
that we can choose to open
or just pass by
leaving the adventure
of a closed door
undiscovered
it is an adventure
because when you open the door
and step thru
what if it is not what you expected
on the other side –
what if you fall down the rabbit hole
and end up in
Wonderland ?
i open the door and step into the dim interior of
The Desperate Clutch –
the team follows me with the trophy
Beach Volleyball Champions 1997 ! We had won it for the third year running ! A bunch of old farts who still could dominate the sand court in a dominating manner while drinking vast quantities of beer and playing six man volleyball- a six person team composed of old beach ball players and young waitresses from the Desperate Clutch – My bar of my creation –
and it did not exist
The Desperate Clutch – the Oldest Non-Existant Bar in Existence – created by myself to sponsor a team of aged beach volleyball players so as to compete in the Carmel Beach Bar Volleyball League – and even tho it did not exist – it was the most Famous Non-Existant Bar in Existence
we even sold condoms in the bathrooms
i say this because after i and the team had entered the bar and ordered “drinks on the house ! ” the condom salesman sat down next to me at my table and proceeded to sell me some new models of sexual safety for the non – existent patrons –
“and here we have the New John Wayne Model- it features – when applied to your johnson- spinning around in Red , White , and Blue like a barber pole while playing the Star Spangled Banner !- gets the girls to patriotic orgasms while getting ridden by the old cowboy – it lights up brightly enough to find your way in the dark to the bathroom in a strange house ! – batteries included ! ”
“Then we offer up the 1812 Overture Model ! -WOW – Is this exciting ! while you bang away in your passion it plays the music – in stereo – and at the climax of your sexual foray- with cymbols crashing and drums thundering- cannons DO blast off ! enhancing your orgasm and turning your ladies legs to jello for hours afterwards in her enjoyment ! ”
“and then we have the Incoming Enterprises Model – powered by a small ICBM for maximum thrust -it features a small nuclear explosion at the moment of Rain and Clouds to light you BOTH up ! ”
“and then -” at this point i excused myself to go take a leak and left the celebration of the “team ” behind as i stepped away from the table and opened the door to the bathroom and stepped into ? –
ten billion light years from Earth – a small private spaceship floating thru a star studded landscape of emptiness -i was alone and just sitting down to tea – when suddenly ! – Tok ! Tok !- a knock on the airlock door !
i got up and went to the airlock door and turned on the light – floating outside was a scruffy looking guy in an aged spacesuit with a doggy suit in tow- the doggy suit had tail wagging and so must have propelled them to my craft – i let them into the airlock and then into my craft
“Hallooo ? i am hitchhiking my way thru space and wonder if i can get a ride for a billion light years or so – and i will gladly trade you bird calls for my ride – or i can also do a great imitation of a shoelace -”
i waved my hitchhiking guest to a seat at my table and offered him a cup of tea -the dog turned out to be a stuffed replica used for propelling a host vehicle thru space and so did not need attention
“never mind – i am at the moment watching as a star collapses and creates a Black Hole – better than watching the presidential speech by RayGun from Earth”
“ah ! perhaps you would like one of these ?-” and offered up a ancient John Wayne Condom- ” for the black hole ? ”
“no thanks – i will be right back-” and i propelled myself to the bathroom door where i opened it and –
stepped into – ?
where have i stepped now ?
another adventure ? life is an adventure –